Yesterday Devyn had her 4 month check-up. The past 4 months have flown by and felt really long all at the same time. We go through a pattern of good nights, then bad nights. It's usually about 3 or 4 decent nights followed by 2 or 3 not so good nights. She had some rough nights last weekend. She was up about every 2 hours on Sunday night. Then she was only up twice in 12 hours Monday night and last night. She still has some tummy issues that wake her up and then keep her awake. I have to be very careful what I eat if I want to sleep.
She weighed in at 13 lbs. She has only gained 1 lb. since her 2 month check-up. That puts her at the 36th percentile. Her weight gain has slowed significantly. The dr isn't really concerned, but said it is something to keep an eye on to make sure her weight gain stays steady. She has chubby cheeks and rolls on her legs, so I think she's fine. :) She's 25 in. now though, which puts her somewhere near the 80th percentile. So she's tall and thin. I guess she'll be like her dad! The dr also said we can give her some oatmeal now that she's 4 months old and give her apple juice to help her poop. Poor thing has such a hard time going sometimes. I'm not sure I want to give her anything yet. They keep changing the recommendation on when to feed to avoid food allergies. It was exclusively nursing until 6 months and now she said they changed it to nursing plus cereal at 4 months. I will do anything to avoid having another child with food allergies. I also don't think she's ready for cereal. She still thrusts her tongue out when we offer her a spoon. It's so hard to be a mom and make decisions like this. I just want to do the right thing!
Developmentally she is ahead of where she needs to be. The boys were always just where they needed to be, so it's different having a baby ahead of where she needs to be. She is so much fun to watch. She learns so much all the time. She started sucking her thumb again. It is so stinking cute! Her hands are getting a little chapped because of it, so I was told I should put mittens on her when we go out so they don't dry out too bad.
The boys are also changing and growing a lot. Aiden is potty trained!!! He still wears diapers to bed, but during the day he goes on the potty. It's wonderful! Now I'll move on to Noah. I really depise potty training. All day long I follow them around asking, "Do you need to go potty? Do you need to go potty?". They are having hilarious conversations and learning things faster than I can keep up. We were eating pancakes one day and Reese help up a piece and said, "Look! A trinagle!". It was a triangle. I wish I could take credit. He learned it from Sesame Street. That kid is something else. 2 is such a fun age. Naughty, but fun. Someday I'll sit down and write all the things that are awesome and difficult about the age of 2, but right now I have 3 hungry little boys who want lunch.
Wednesday, October 30, 2013
Thursday, October 10, 2013
Noah Q & A
My last post was all about questions we get asked about the fact that we have triplets (and things not to say). The other thing we get a lot of questions about is Noah's food allergies. Despite the fact that food allergies are on the rise many people are still in the dark about them. I can honestly say I didn't understand much about food allergies until I had a child with one. We have learned an awful lot over the past 9 months and I'm sure we have much more to learn.
1. How did you know? Noah's first reaction was to his first exposure to peanut butter. He had an asthma attack, then started swelling and itching and eventually had hives.
2. Will he outgrow it? Most likely not. His allergy is considered severe. Peanut allergies are the allergy that people are least likely to outgrow. He had an anaphylactic reaction so our allergerist would never put him in a desensitization study (where they expose a person to an allergen a little bit at a time). He wouldn't even do a skin prick test for nuts on Noah because of the severity of his first reaction. He only tested his blood. Typically the first reaction is the most mild.
3. What happens if he gets exposed? That is really anyone's guess. Our allergist told us that next time we will only have minutes to respond. Frankly, it's terrifying every time he starts coughing, itching his eyes or breaking out in hives. I contantly recite my plan of action. First we give the epipen, then we call 9-1-1. Then we watch him like a hawk and give the 2nd epipen if the first one isn't working.
4. Can't you just give him some Benadryl for a reaction? No. It only controls the itching and symptoms of a reaction. The Epipen is basically adrenaline and that is what interferes with the reaction. Even after using the Epipen he would need emergency attention because the reaction can continue and further medications could be needed.
5. So, does he just need to avoid peanuts? He actually has a mild tree nut (think almonds, cashews, etc.) as well. We need to avoid all nuts and sesame seeds (they have some sort of cross-reaction and the body responds to them like peanuts sometimes..I'm not sure I get it, we were just avoid them). This also means that we have to read every single food item we purchase. If it says contains, may contain, processed on the same equipment, processed in the same facility as or anything else similar to that we can't buy it. I have made mistakes and not realized until I got home that I was so used to buying something that I forgot to check. I bought Nestle chocolate chips last week and realized as I was opening them that I didn't check them. I looked and sure enough they are processed right along with a product with peanuts. They will be leaving our house immediately.
6. Why do so many kids have allergies now? I have no idea. If anyone claims they know, they're wrong. There is no clear answer. There are many theories..from vaccines (our allergist said that's "rubbish"-he's British) to the hygiene theory (we're too clean and take too many antibiotics) and the way our food is modified and processed. No one knows, but they are clearly on the rise. I read that 1 in 13 kids has a food allergy. That's about 2 kids per classroom. Scary stuff!
We don't put Noah in the church nursery, we skip events because it's just too risky and we constantly worry about when we'll need to respond. I watched a video that was posted on facebook about a person who had a reaction to a wasp sting and continued to react for hours and nearly died. Noah was standing near me and I looked at him and cried. How is it that something as innocent as peanuts could kill him so quickly? It's not fair. It's makes me angry. But I know it's just something that we have to get over and deal with. It's not the end of the world, just a roadblock. We have to find ways around it and move on.
1. How did you know? Noah's first reaction was to his first exposure to peanut butter. He had an asthma attack, then started swelling and itching and eventually had hives.
2. Will he outgrow it? Most likely not. His allergy is considered severe. Peanut allergies are the allergy that people are least likely to outgrow. He had an anaphylactic reaction so our allergerist would never put him in a desensitization study (where they expose a person to an allergen a little bit at a time). He wouldn't even do a skin prick test for nuts on Noah because of the severity of his first reaction. He only tested his blood. Typically the first reaction is the most mild.
3. What happens if he gets exposed? That is really anyone's guess. Our allergist told us that next time we will only have minutes to respond. Frankly, it's terrifying every time he starts coughing, itching his eyes or breaking out in hives. I contantly recite my plan of action. First we give the epipen, then we call 9-1-1. Then we watch him like a hawk and give the 2nd epipen if the first one isn't working.
4. Can't you just give him some Benadryl for a reaction? No. It only controls the itching and symptoms of a reaction. The Epipen is basically adrenaline and that is what interferes with the reaction. Even after using the Epipen he would need emergency attention because the reaction can continue and further medications could be needed.
5. So, does he just need to avoid peanuts? He actually has a mild tree nut (think almonds, cashews, etc.) as well. We need to avoid all nuts and sesame seeds (they have some sort of cross-reaction and the body responds to them like peanuts sometimes..I'm not sure I get it, we were just avoid them). This also means that we have to read every single food item we purchase. If it says contains, may contain, processed on the same equipment, processed in the same facility as or anything else similar to that we can't buy it. I have made mistakes and not realized until I got home that I was so used to buying something that I forgot to check. I bought Nestle chocolate chips last week and realized as I was opening them that I didn't check them. I looked and sure enough they are processed right along with a product with peanuts. They will be leaving our house immediately.
6. Why do so many kids have allergies now? I have no idea. If anyone claims they know, they're wrong. There is no clear answer. There are many theories..from vaccines (our allergist said that's "rubbish"-he's British) to the hygiene theory (we're too clean and take too many antibiotics) and the way our food is modified and processed. No one knows, but they are clearly on the rise. I read that 1 in 13 kids has a food allergy. That's about 2 kids per classroom. Scary stuff!
We don't put Noah in the church nursery, we skip events because it's just too risky and we constantly worry about when we'll need to respond. I watched a video that was posted on facebook about a person who had a reaction to a wasp sting and continued to react for hours and nearly died. Noah was standing near me and I looked at him and cried. How is it that something as innocent as peanuts could kill him so quickly? It's not fair. It's makes me angry. But I know it's just something that we have to get over and deal with. It's not the end of the world, just a roadblock. We have to find ways around it and move on.
Friday, October 4, 2013
Q & A and what not to say..
I've decided to answer some questions that we get asked all the time and give some suggestions of things that are probably better left unsaid when you meet parents of multiples. I've been thinking about writing this for quite a while, but haven't been able to quite put in to words in a way that is both honest and appropriate. If you have said or asked any of these things please don't feel bad. I have said/asked things before that I now realize would probably have been better to keep to myself. Hopefully this will give you some guidance next time you come across someone with multiples...
1. "I'm sorry". Yes. People really do say that. How do you expect me to respond? Should I break down weeping and tell you that I'm so dissapointed that I have 3 (now 4) healthy children? I'm never quite sure what to say other than, "It's a blessing". Even if you're joking it implies that there is something horrible about having more than one child at a time when in fact it is an incredible blessing. Don't be sorry! Be joyful that all went well.
2. "I hope you're done". Nothing irritates me more than when a perfect stranger assumes that if you have multiples you should just quit having children immediately. When you say that you assume that I can't handle the 3 boys and should do society a favor and not have more. I may not be mom of the year and I may have bad days as a mom, but I think that our boys are turning out just fine and having one more child was not going to throw things completely off kilter causing my children to go off the deep end.
3. "Are they natural?" It's hard not to respond sarcastically and say something to the effect of "No! Completely fake! We had them manufactured!". What people want to know is how they were conceived. We did not do IVF. We were on a very low dose of a medication given to "jump start" things when we were having a difficult time conceiving on our own. We had a less than 1% chance of conceiving higher order multiples. It was clearly God's plan for our life to have triplets.
4. "Did you know you were having triplets?" Again, hard not to be sarcastic. Yes, we knew. We found out when I was 6 weeks pregnant and were in complete shock. At 7 1/2 weeks we went for a follow-up ultrasound and saw 3 beautiful, strong heartbeats.
Some of the most frequent questions we get asked are:
1. Are they identical? The answer is that we don't think so. 2 of the boys have the same blood type so it is possible, but I really don't want to pay the money it would take to find out. It does not bother us at all when people stop us to ask if they are triplets, if they are identical or any other "general" questions that don't probe into our personal life too far.
2. Do they have the same personality? Well, they are still 3 different people. So, no. Instead you can ask us how fun it is to watch 3 boys born at the same time grow..as individuals. I love that they are triplets and want to show them how unique and special it is. At the same time I want them to feel like individuals who are not constantly "lumped" together because they were born together.
3. How do you do it? Honestly? I don't know. It's all I've ever known as a mom. It's not like I could pick 1 or 2 to take care of. You choose what's important and leave the rest to get done when there's time. I'm organized and my life is like an assembly line. I think that's the best way to describe it.
I'm sure there are more things that I am forgetting. If there is something that you're wondering, just ask. I will answer almost any question. If you are out and see someone with multiples don't just stare, say something kind. Compliment them if they are well behaved, tell them they are very blessed or give them a polite smile. When you stare we feel like a freak show. Nothing pleases us more than when someone stops us to say what an inredible blessing triplets are. Yes! I can still see the faces of some of the kindest people who stopped us and told us how blessed we are and how happy it makes them to see triplets. It makes us happy too. :) This is a time in my life when I feel like I am doing exactly what I was designed to do. It's not always easy, but it's what I was made for.
1. "I'm sorry". Yes. People really do say that. How do you expect me to respond? Should I break down weeping and tell you that I'm so dissapointed that I have 3 (now 4) healthy children? I'm never quite sure what to say other than, "It's a blessing". Even if you're joking it implies that there is something horrible about having more than one child at a time when in fact it is an incredible blessing. Don't be sorry! Be joyful that all went well.
2. "I hope you're done". Nothing irritates me more than when a perfect stranger assumes that if you have multiples you should just quit having children immediately. When you say that you assume that I can't handle the 3 boys and should do society a favor and not have more. I may not be mom of the year and I may have bad days as a mom, but I think that our boys are turning out just fine and having one more child was not going to throw things completely off kilter causing my children to go off the deep end.
3. "Are they natural?" It's hard not to respond sarcastically and say something to the effect of "No! Completely fake! We had them manufactured!". What people want to know is how they were conceived. We did not do IVF. We were on a very low dose of a medication given to "jump start" things when we were having a difficult time conceiving on our own. We had a less than 1% chance of conceiving higher order multiples. It was clearly God's plan for our life to have triplets.
4. "Did you know you were having triplets?" Again, hard not to be sarcastic. Yes, we knew. We found out when I was 6 weeks pregnant and were in complete shock. At 7 1/2 weeks we went for a follow-up ultrasound and saw 3 beautiful, strong heartbeats.
Some of the most frequent questions we get asked are:
1. Are they identical? The answer is that we don't think so. 2 of the boys have the same blood type so it is possible, but I really don't want to pay the money it would take to find out. It does not bother us at all when people stop us to ask if they are triplets, if they are identical or any other "general" questions that don't probe into our personal life too far.
2. Do they have the same personality? Well, they are still 3 different people. So, no. Instead you can ask us how fun it is to watch 3 boys born at the same time grow..as individuals. I love that they are triplets and want to show them how unique and special it is. At the same time I want them to feel like individuals who are not constantly "lumped" together because they were born together.
3. How do you do it? Honestly? I don't know. It's all I've ever known as a mom. It's not like I could pick 1 or 2 to take care of. You choose what's important and leave the rest to get done when there's time. I'm organized and my life is like an assembly line. I think that's the best way to describe it.
I'm sure there are more things that I am forgetting. If there is something that you're wondering, just ask. I will answer almost any question. If you are out and see someone with multiples don't just stare, say something kind. Compliment them if they are well behaved, tell them they are very blessed or give them a polite smile. When you stare we feel like a freak show. Nothing pleases us more than when someone stops us to say what an inredible blessing triplets are. Yes! I can still see the faces of some of the kindest people who stopped us and told us how blessed we are and how happy it makes them to see triplets. It makes us happy too. :) This is a time in my life when I feel like I am doing exactly what I was designed to do. It's not always easy, but it's what I was made for.
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